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Monday, March 21, 2005
TV Round-Up
Battlestar Galactica: Colonial Day
I have really got to stop watching new episodes of Sci-Fi's two Stargate series after Battlestar Galactica. They just pale by comparison in the light of that is Battlestar Galactica.

"Colonial Day" is an episode that makes you think it's going to be one thing, but instead suddenly veers off into far more interesting territory about halfway through the episode. What could have just been just an episode about the attempted assignation of Laura Roslin instead becomes something more during the course of the episode--a look at the politics of the fleet and where different parties stand. Now, I will have to admit I agree with my good friend Barry, that it seems a bit unlikely that only thirty plus days out of the destructive Cylon attack on their home world that the fleet would be so bitterly divided as we saw here. Or that there would be so many well organzied factions. Of course, I also have to consider that what we've seen is the leadership struggling to help the population as a whole survive--from finding water to fighting for fuel last week. So, it may be possible that there are groups in there that are becoming vocal in their protests and organized. But I am not sure that I find Tom Zerek's push for power to be all that strong given that most of the fleet seems to think of him as nothing more than a terrorists who will blow up a building or two to get what he wants or push forward his agenda.

In a lot of ways, you have to wonder if Zarek is any better than a Cylon? He's a human who is not above using their methods of killing the innocent to get what he wants. Of course, we're not quite sure what Zerek's overall agneda is on the show just yet. For all we know, he could be a Cylon. But it was fun to watch Zarek make a deal with Ellen Tigh. The implication is, of course, that Zarek got her to kill the assassin and thus erase the evidence of Zarek being behind the whole plot. But was there more to it than that? Why is Zarek seizing power now?--he has waited this long and seems to be setting himself up in a cat-bird seat. Of course, a vaccum at the top may be what the Cylons really want and need--hence Helen uses aerek's political aspirations to gain a favor in much the same way as Six plays upon Baltar's lust for the ladies (ably shown here when Baltar gives the female reporter an "exclusive.")

It was interesting to see Roslin finally begin to play the poltical game and play it well. Sensing her vice presidential candidate is doomed, she jettisons him for Baltar. Batlar, the man a few weeks ago she suspected of being a Cylon agent is now who she wants a heart-beat away from assuming her role of leading the people. Because the alternative of Tom Zerek is too distateful for her. Man, when everyone finds out that--oh yeah, Baltar has betrayed everyone as deeply as he has, that is going to be one hell of a blowout.

Give credit to the new Galactica for not just making the Richard Hatch character a one-shot ratings grabber stunt cast, but instead using it to the advantage of the storytelling on the series.

Meanwhile, back on Caprica, Hilo puts all the pieces together and figures out that Boomer is a Cylon. This on-going plotline has been well done and executed all season. The question is--now what? Will Hilo escape the planet or will he now fall into the Cylon hands without Boomer's help?

Spring Break Shark Attack

Before you hit the comment button and begin to ask me what I was thinking by watching this movie, hear me out. I knew going in that it would be bad. I was just tuning in to see how bad it could possibly be. My answer: Pretty much as bad as I thought. And according to the ratings, I was not alone in my curiousity.

The plot is pretty transparent. Our heroine, Danielle, wants to meet up with her friends for Spring Break. but Daddy says no. So, Danielle cashes in her plane ticket to work with Habitat for Humanity and heads off to Florida for Spring Break. Oh yeah, her brother is in the same city studying sharks and has some cool device that if it works right will scare off sharks. Now, it started off well, with people immediately becoming shark food, but then the movie stupidly decides--hey, we need some character development. So, Danielle meets a guy named J.D. who's preferred seduction method is the ruffies and Shane, the loveable poor guy from the other side of the tracks (as in he can't yet go to college as he can't afford it). In a wacky twist of fate, Shane's mom (played by Kathy Baker who apparently lost a bet and had to be in this) owns a boat rental company and rents out a boat to this guy who is up to no good. Unfortunately, they spend a lot of time with this whole plot thing, when we were honestly there to see sharks lining up at the buffet to eat stupid people. Alas, that doesn't happen until well into the second hour. Along the way, we party a lot, which had me wondering if the sharks had invented some kind of reverse scuba system so they could come in and feast. Unfortuantely, not so much.

Along the way, we have lots of gratitous women in bikini time and I'm not really complaining. I mean, I've not seen The O.C., but I will give you that Shannon Lucia, who plays Danielle is not displeasing on the eyes.

One good reason to watch... Posted by Hello

But, there are some huge leaps of logic here. First of all, Danielle packs enough clothes for a six or eight week stay in one small suitcase. And her parents don't trust her enough to apparenly leave the house alone or get on-line but yet they send her off to the airport by herself after she's said she'd rather go to Spring Break in Florida. Hello? Of course, J.D. is kind of an idiot for keeping his stash of roofies with him at all times on the off chance he needs to get with some hot girl.

Finally, we head out to sea and the sharks go nuts. Turns out mysterious bad guy man is chumming the water and there's this new reef that makes shark attack. Why we're not quite sure as it's not really explained. J.D.'s dating technique comes to light just in time for him to become shark bait. Danielle's dad shows up just as she, brother and Shane lure all the sharks out to sea using brother's shark repeller. Suddenly Daddy is proud of Danielle and by golly, she can sure do anything and she's so grown up. She then goes and kisses Shane and they joke they should go to Cancun next year.

I have not even come close to doing justice to this movie. It was so bad. So many leaps of logic and things that if you think about for even ten seconds don't make sense. Also apparently if you are surrounded by hungry sharks and you hold really, really still, they will leave you alone. Never mind that you and all your friends were thrashing about like dervishes before.

But my favorite part--we have a guy out using a parachute to ski on the water and he skiis right into the mouth of a waiting shark. Damn that shark had some good timing!

posted by Michael Hickerson at 3/21/2005 02:38:00 PM | |
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